Volume No. 1, August ‘09
BLUE LITMUS….The Wall Magazine
Communists vs CGPA
“The non-existence of an academic GC - boon or bane”, as an inter-hall debate topic wouldn’t have stopped Patel from bagging the gold [yo patel !], but if such a GC existed, we sure could have had less “chaggi dudes” in the latest batch. Scene in patel hall before the endsems ,was amazingly peaceful. 2nd years ,quite sure they couldn’t have done better preparation, confidently started playing “bollympics”, orkutting, CSing and movieing and other not-mentionable-in-public-literature activities. No one ever heard a single repent after any exams. People were so cheerful in the mess, for one moment it seemed this year there are going to be 70+ nehlis alone from the 2nd year batch of patel hall. But in Patel ,we respect the traditions, more than anything else. People were found worrying whether the traditions would change forever!!! Even came a day, when there were found 6 patelians ,indulged in studies in library, at the same point of time…!!!
But things are usually more complex than they seemed. Only time can reveal the truth. Came the time of results and there were sighs of relief. This batch was worth. There was left not more than a single nehli in the whole batch.how wonderful !! people started greeting each other and seasons of partying are yet in progress. Communism has won finally. There is an even distribution of CGPA amidst all residents of the hall. We have raised the bars once again. And we promise we will live upto it, no matter what may.
CONFESSIONS OF A NEW PATELIAN
Bham! Slam! Wham!
You wake up with heavy eyes, watch your roomie walking up to the door like a zombie, and then opening it.
‘Saare second years 5 minute ke andar footer field mein’ the voice of a senior.
Time: 5.00 am
Place: Somewhere in Patel Hall of residence.
It takes you a few seconds to even realise who you are. You wear your shoes and rush to the footer field.
All your batchmates are standing in rows. You quickly find a place at the end of a row, hoping that they won’t notice you.
A senior yells ‘Head count shuru kar’.
Sanjay: Oooone! (4200 db)
Bhaskar: Twooo! (3100 db)
Arpit: Threee! (2800 db)
Chowksi: Fooooooouuuuuuuuur! (4800 db)
Shayantan: five (38 db)
‘Abey! Tu bahar aa.’, Angry Mohan yells.
(When we did not know his name we referred him as ‘Angry Mohan’. Today we call him Aggu.)
Aggu: Fivvve! (4500 db)
Shayantan: five (41 db)
All seniors: (Censored)
Aggu: Abey Jor se! Five (4600 db)
Shayantan: five (43 db)
All seniors: (Censored)
Aggu: Jor se!(4999 db)
Shayantan: five (44.35 db)
Aggu: Tu peeche ja ke khada ho ja.
You stand there hoping that the proceedings get over quickly. But what follows is a batchmate intro test, exercises and 2.2.
This is how a day used to begin.
Thou shalt never use the catwalk.
Thou shalt off your lights by 10.00
Thou shalt always ask permission before leaving the mess table.
The list is endless.
Now I’ve always wondered whether our seniors were ever juniors.
I mean can you imagine Mukesh sitting on floors, during wing interaction?
Can you imagine Kumar Ritwik going ‘aa..ab..er..uh’ during SOP.
Can you imagine Mallikda giving his intro?
Now another very important process of becoming a Patelian is The Wing Interaction.
You go from wing to wing, door to door, knock. ‘Sir, we’ve come for wing interaction’.
The tone is similar to that of a salesman ‘Sir, we’ve come from Eureka Forbes’.
You stare at the seniors sitting on the floor. They organise themselves and ask your intro. Intros, Fundas, Tasks, etc. Then comes the killer question ‘Hum mein se kis kis ke paas bandi ho sakti hai?’
You look at them and understand that most of them won’t be having one. So what do you do?
Pick the 2 or 3 deadliest seniors who were bothering you the most. Say ‘Aapki hogi’.
A huge smile follows. And trust me those guys won’t trouble you much after that.
A lot of Bhaatbaazi for now.
Will you just remain standing here?
Don’t you have to study for midsems.
Padhna nahin hai?
Finally, congratulations to all Open IIT winners.
YO PATEL! (as we always end anything this way.)
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